Surgery Round #2

Day Two: 5/11/09
Surgery Round #2

The reason for this trip started with Granny needing help during her cataract surgery. Pop still drives on occasion, but to be honest that proposition scares me greatly. I am certainly happy that I was here to drive on the surgery/post op days and to generally be a pair of young hands to assist when/where needed. That being said… old people in surgery centers are hilarious.

The majority of people having their cataracts removed at the Wills Eye Surgery Center were being attended to by their spouse. The dynamics within these couples were enough to keep me entertained for the majority of the two plus hours that Pop and I were waiting for Granny. Watching the staff interact with the patients was also quite funny. Here are my top three surgery center moments:

1. A couple, probably in their early 70’s, was sitting in the chairs closest to Pop and me. She was having her cataract removed and her husband was adamant that she needed to fill her paperwork out prior to the surgery. They were bickering about this for quite a while. At one point it seemed like what was holding up her compliance was the lack of a pen. I had a pen in my purse and told her I would be happy to loan it to her. This is when she snapped at me, “The pen isn’t the problem. I have a pen. The problem is he wants me to fill out the postoperative surgery survey before the surgery.” At this point I looked at him, laughed and went on my way to get my computer out of the car.

2. Even though we were at an eye surgery center, the majority of the people in the place seemed to be deaf. Listening to the check in people yell for patients and AT patients was quite entertaining. I was a good 50 feet from the check in counter and I could hear 95% of all conversations taking place. This is also true for Granny (sorry Granny but you know it is true). Having a conversation in the waiting area is nearly impossible because EVERYONE has to yell for the person they are with to hear them. Speaking of yelling couples…

3. My favorite couple was the Rachel Ray couple. From the second they sat down they were bickering. She didn’t want to sit where he sat. She didn’t like the magazine he was reading. He didn’t like the newspaper she was reading, etc, etc… They probably sat down around 9:50 am. At 10:00 am Rachel Ray came on the TV in the waiting room. The woman didn’t seem to notice this until about 10:15, at which point she kept asking her husband… “Is that that Rachel Ray?” And he would reply, “Who?”. I stopped counting the number of times this exchange occurred at seven. My favorite commentary sequence was this: The woman says, “She has gotten heavier.” The man says, “What?”… “She has gotten heavier”… “Who?” … “This Rachel Ray.” It was like listening to a broken record… but at least the song was kind of entertaining.

Until tomorrow,
Katy